Find out the latest news and topics of interest from Dr. James G. Hood, D.D.S., M.A.!
Archive for the ‘Adoption’ Category
Online Support: The Perfect Answer for Many Adoptive Parents
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
Support can come in lots of ways for people who have adopted children who have special needs. Talking to someone who “gets it” is one of the best things that we as adoptive parents can do to normalize our experience and feel like we are not alone. However, some types of support just aren’t possibilities for us during our most trying of days.
Here are some reasons why “real life” as opposed to virtual, online support aren’t possible for adoptive parents:
1) Traditional support groups require us to leave our homes. This requires child care. Many adoption support groups do not provide child care.
2) Traditional support groups that meet in person sometimes offer child care. However, sometimes our children simply cannot function in that setting — even if it is geared to special needs children.
3) Sometimes we are simply to exhausted to make ourselves look presentable. Even if we want to get out and go to a group, it would require having time for a shower and ttime to find clothes that match and don’t have holes in them, perhaps makeup or perfume… you get the idea. Sometimes we’re just too tired at the end of the day to get there.
4) If we can’t meet in person, phone calls are the next best thing. However, it is quite embarrassing to be talking to someone with the noise of a kid raging in the background or while being called a variety of interesting and colorful names by an angry teenager. After we’ve said, “wait, hold on a second” five or six times it just gets too frustrating to try any longer.
5) Having visitors would be another natural way to connect with others, but I know you can think of 30 reasons why THAT isn’t going to happen. At least I can.
6) Meeting another adoptive parent for coffee or lunch is a great idea IF all the kids are in school and IF the school isn’t calling to interrupt the lunch or coffee time to say that we have to come to the school to intervene, give advice, or bring them home.
So, naturally, those of us who have interesting children at home often can’t find support by going to a “real life” support group. We can’t have people over, go out to meet someone, or talk on the phone. Fortunately, there is the internet and now even those of us in the midst of the battle in the trenches can participate in an online group.
So obviously, after reading the paragraphs above, you should already be able to articulate these reasons why online support has been my favorite type in my fifteen years as a foster and adoptive parent:
I don’t have to get dressed up. In fact I don’t have to get dressed at all. I don’t have to go anywhere. I can do it any time of day or night, it doesn’t matter if everyone is awake, or nobody is. Nobody can hear the noise and chaos in the background.
I also find that the ability to write down what I am feeling (which often is required for online support) helps me understand myself more.
So if you are finding a need to “talk” to “someone who gets it” during the next weeks, why not check out online support options? List servs, message boards, blogs, and other avenues of online connections can be just what you are looking for.
If you have not heard, Adopt America has an online support group via Facebook. You can check us out by searching for Adopt America Network’s Support Group on facebook and asking to join. We’d love to have you be a part of our group. And remember … we couldn’t care less what you look like right now, or what your kids are doing or saying in the background, or if you have lots of energy or very little. We are definitely a “come as you are” group. “See” you soon!
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Adoption – the Hood Family
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
My wife, Karen, and I have adopted ten children. We have children from Korea, India, Ethiopia, and from the United States. We used WACAP (World Association of Children and Parents) for our foreign adoptions. We went through Child Protective Services (CPS) for most of our in-country adoptions.
I would certainly encourage people interested in having children to consider adoption. There is definitely a need for adoptive parents locally and globally.
Being a parent is a big responsibility, which brings big joy and sometimes big sorrow. However, we now have 16 children, 10 adopted, 5 biologic, and one foster daughter. The satisfaction of seeing then mature into responsible adults is worth any hardship.
Keep smiling,
Dr. James Hood
A Helpful Guide to International Adoption
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
It is often a difficult, emotional and confusing journey through the process of international adoption. Once you have jumped through one hoop, there seems to always be another waiting for you. And although the hoops are necessary, it is comforting to have information of which to refer.
Some frequently asked questions encompass the differences in the types of adoptions. International adoption laws differ from country to country. For a child to be eligible for an international adoption program, he/she must qualify under the laws of their country of origin. You must comply with U.S. federal laws and the laws of your home state to be even considered to adopt. U.S. Federal law does not prohibit Americans to adopt regardless of age, sex, race, color, national origin, religion, or income; various international agencies however, do often restrict those who have developmental or physical disabilities, single parents, or even those with a lower income. For children abroad to come to the United States, you must determine if they are eligible to immigrate under the U.S. Immigration and Nationality Act.
Types of adoption processes differ as well. If you travel abroad and at one of the family owned and run facilities you feel a deep connection to one of the children and you want to bring this into your home and ultimately, your family, this type of international adoption is independent and usually places all of the weight of the adoption process on your shoulders. Depending on the kind of adoption you chose, the more or less likely you will encounter ethics and high standards in the adoption process. Further, depending on the kind of adoption you chose, the more or less likely you are to be exposed to better costs, children’s health and facilitator competence.
Building from various laws to types of adoption, the actual process of adopting your child can again be, a confusing process on your journey in expanding your family. There are more players in the adoption process than you may expect. Your family and the parent(s) of the child, professional agencies, attorneys, adoption specialists, and licensing specialists are some of the players you need to be aware of. Nationally or internationally, the business and personal ethics of each player spreads across the board.
The application process is essential for the adoption to be successful, and regardless of the type of adoption you chose, one thing remains the same: the placement home study. A home study is basically a series of appointments with an adoption professional. After you find an agency within the United States to work with your international adoption, a local caseworker is assigned to your individual case. Usually there is a minimum of four visits (depending on the state and/or country) between you and your assigned caseworker.
Out of all the decisions, applications, visits, and international laws and so on, the most agonizing part of the adoption process is usually the waiting game. It can take between months and years or more for a family to receive a referral on a child. After approval, it takes time for you and your future child to be matched. Time is dependant upon the race, origin, other county’s laws, U.S. immigration laws, developmental disabilities, age, and etc. This process has been compared to a biological family’s pregnancy period. Each time a child is matched, it is an emotional “pregnancy test” for those waiting. Once approved, its been described as a metaphorical “labor.’ If the child match falls through, the description is an even more emotional “miscarriage.” Even with the pressures of your emotional roller coaster, your are expected to keep up with the expectations your state, country and country of your potential child. f you do not receive your referral or your matched child within a year, the previously mentioned placement home study must be renewed every twelve months.
After the waiting and the arrival of your newest family member, there are obligations you are responsible for. A minimum of three more visits (depending on the sate and/or country) are required. Nutrition, childhood development, emotional issues, discussing the adoption and education are only a few of the subjects you will encounter. For international adoption, more pressing matters include culture shock and communication difficulties.
There are many hoops to jump through in the adoption process. Many of those hoops will most likely be wrought with confusion if you do not have the proper resources to help on your journey to adopt a child. Thus, there is a need for a guide to be written, not only to fill the literary gap in detailed adoption information, but also to educate society on the importance of international adoption as well as the importance of the legitimate people who work to make life a little easier for those attempting to understand the adoption process.
About the Author
Karen Hood was born and raised in Great Falls, Montana. As an undergraduate, she attended the College of St. Benedict in St. Joseph, Minnesota, and St. John’s University in Collegeville, Minnesota. She attended the University of Great Falls in Great Falls, Montana. Hood received a B.S. Degree in Natural Science from the College of St. Benedict and minored in both Psychology and Secondary Education. Upon her graduation, Hood and her husband taught science and math on the island of St. Croix in the U.S. Virgin Islands. Hood has completed postgraduate classes at the University of Iowa in Iowa City, Iowa. In May 2001, she completed her Master’s Degree in Pastoral Ministry at Gonzaga University in Spokane, Washington. She has taken postgraduate classes at Lewis and Clark College on the North Idaho college campus in Coeur d’Alene, Idaho, and Taylor University in Fort Wayne, Indiana. Hood is working on research projects to complete her Ph.D. in Leadership Studies at Gonzaga University in Spokane, Washington.
Karen Hood is also an avid child advocate. She works with children as a foster parent in the State of Washington as well as a Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) volunteer in the juvenile court system in Spokane County. Hood and her husband have a strong passion to fight for the plight of abused and neglected children and the rights of all children on a local, national, and international level. Hood is also Guardian Ad Litem (GAL) and a CASA volunteer for abused and neglected children in the juvenile court system. Hood is an advocate of literacy for children and has written many articles and books on this subject. She also has written many articles on the rights of children and is currently working on books about the plight of children.
For more information, you can contact the author at her office below:
Karen Jean Matsko Hood
507 N. Sullivan Rd. Suite LL-7
Spokane Valley, WA 99037 USA
Phone: (509) 924-3550 Fax: (509) 922-9949
May is National Foster Care Month!
Monday, May 23, 2011
Source: National Foster Parent Association
Presidential Proclamation
President Barak Obama issued a presidential proclamation designating May 2011 as National Foster Care Month. The proclamation begins,
“For nearly half a million youth in foster care across our country, the best path to success we can give them is the chance to experience a loving home where they can feel secure and thrive. During National Foster Care Month, we renew our commitment to ensuring a brighter future for foster youth, and we celebrate the selfless individuals who make a meaningful difference in their lives.” You can read the full proclamation here.
What can you do? Here are some ideas.
- Go to the FosterCareMonth.org website and get some action ideas! See if there is an event in your area.
- Write a letter to the editor of your local newspaper. Tell them why the contribution of foster families should be celebrated.
- Raise money for your local or state foster parent association by creating a Walk Me Home walk.
- Help a foster child by becoming a mentor or a CASA.
- Call, email or write your local social services or family services director – tell them that you are thankful that they do their best to protect our most vulnerable children.
- Once a week this month, bring up the topic of foster care in a conversation with friends or co-workers.
Walk Me Home
Walk Me Home….to the place I belong is the signature fund-raising and awareness event for foster care in America. We know not everyone can be a foster parent, but Walk Me Home is a great way to support the over 424,000 children in foster care. This year thousands and thousands of walkers will participate in Walk Me Home events across the country, raising funds to support the life changing programs and activities of foster care associations throughout the United States.
Get your organization, family, or just yourself involved! Get more information at the Walk Me Home web page, and check out the cool music videos.
NFPA is proud to announce the Dave Thomas Foundation as the newest Walk Me Home sponsor.
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